Jamie McCloone: coming to a theatre near you soon.

The Misremembered Man 

A new play by Christina McKenna

Being the story of a lonely farmer's search for love and meaning in his life.

There are seven main characters in the play and we require strong actors to fill the roles. Ideally you should have stage experience but if you can bring freshness and intelligence to your part then that will count in your favour.

  PRINCIPALS 

  JAMIE McCLOONE – bachelor farmer in his early 40s. He’s shy and has problems stemming from an unhappy childhood spent largely in an orphanage. Outwardly a simple soul, there's a lot more about Jamie that doesn't meet the eye.

  ROSE McFADDEN - Jamie’s friend, late 40s. Rose could talk for Ireland and has a generous and compassionate nature. This is a truly memorable part.

  PADDY McFADDEN – Rose’s husband and Jamie’s friend. He’s a farmer in his late 40s. Doesn’t say too much but has a kind heart. 

  LYDIA DEVINE - Teacher, early 40s. A personable and caring woman, she’s the only child of a deceased and joyless Protestant minister. Lydia is looking for a man and some fun in her life. 

  ELIZABETH DEVINE - Lydia’s mother, 70s. Although a kindly woman, she's unusually strait-laced. She’s in poor health and needs looking after. 

  DAPHNE - Lydia’s best friend, early 40s, is a librarian. She’s outgoing and fun-loving, and wishes to see Lydia settled down and happy. She doesn't suffer fools gladly.

  GLADYS MILLMAN - Lydia’s aunt, 60s, owner of a seaside guesthouse. She’s Elizabeth’s younger sister and her complete opposite. Not quite the femme fatale, she likes to cut a dash. 

  DR BREWSTER - Jamie’s GP, 50s. His work among the rustics has made him a little cynical yet he remains a caring man. He has an on-off relationship with Gladys Millman. 

  MADAME CALINDA - Fortune-teller, 50s. She’s a larger-than-life figure who ticks all the boxes when it comes to dubious clairvoyants and palmists. She speaks with the broad country accent of a Traveller. 

  DORIS CRINK - Postmistress, 40s, is a simple soul who knows her customers better than most. She has a soft spot for Jamie McCloone and is actively pursuing him.

MINOR ROLES

  MILDRED CRINK - Doris’s sister, 40s.

  DR O’CONNOR - Locum GP, 40s, is a heart-throb with a stethoscope. 

  FATHER FINIAN - Nursing home chaplain, 30s.

  SINEAD - Guesthouse assistant. 

  SAMMY - Postman, early 20s. 

  HUGH - Hotel waiter, 19 or 20.

  VOICES CAST 

  EIGHTY-SIX - Small orphan boy. 

  MASTER KEANEY - Orphanage manager, the original Mr Nasty. 

  MOTHER SUPERIOR - Orphanage head nun, a cruel woman. 

  YOUNG NUN - Orphanage staffer, not nice. 

  MICK McCLOONE - Farmer, a lovely man. 

  ALICE McCLOONE - Mick’s wife, a lovely woman.

We'll be auditioning and reading during the next few weeks at Anaverna, Ravensdale. The venue is the auditorium overlooking the old stableyard. Meetings begin at 7.00 pm and will last for about two hours each time. 

End of Story

We're nearly there! The play is almost written. So let's see what we have so far.

We're aiming for a play in two acts. Each act will be at least 30 minutes long. A good length to aim for is a 90-minute play, with two acts, each lasting 45 minutes.

But these are technical issues. If your play is brilliant—and of course it will be—then it doesn't matter if it's short, medium or long. You have a story to tell, and it's up to you to make that story as gripping as possible. Your audience have to leave the theatre happy!

Let's look at a possible scenario for the play. (This is only a suggestion, to help kick-start your own imagination.)

ACT ONE

Scene One: Amelia and Violet are discussing the recent spate of hauntings at Kensington Hall. Millie announces that the paranormal investigators have arrived. She shows them in.

Amelia and Violet inform them of the deaths of Sir Geoffrey and Lady Elora. It's decided that the ghost must be that of Elora. The PIG team take their leave, promising to return with their equipment the next day.

Scene Two: Amelia is reading the newspaper when Millie announces another visitor. It's Detective-Sergeant Mick Grady. He's the last person Amelia wishes to see. Millie tells her that Grady is here at her invitation.

The Sergeant had investigated Elora's death and found nothing suspect. He declared at the time that she died accidentally. But now he's telling Amelia that tongues are wagging in the village. Certain people believe that Elora may have been murdered. We're beginning to suspect Amelia.

Scene Three: Following up on Krystal's suggestion, the PIG team hold a séance. Krystal digs out her crystal ball and they gather round a table. They're joined by Lady Violet and Millie. Lady Amelia pokes her head in the door before the séance begins and declares it a "superstitious waste of precious living time" or some such.

The group join hands. Krystal looks into the ball and calls up the "spirits". Before long there are raps and thumps. Then Krystal makes contact with Sir Geoffrey. We only hear his voice. He tells the group that not only was his own death suspect but that Lady Elora was probably murdered as well.

Somebody asks: "Who's the murderer? Was there more than one?"

"I cannot say," answers Sir Geoffrey. But he also tells them that he made a secret will and hid it somewhere in the house.

"Where?" somebody asks.

"That's for me to know and for you to find out," says Geoffrey.

ACT TWO

Scene One: Detective-Sergeant Grady meets Millie. She tells him about the séance and her suspicions. He scoffs. He's a realist and doesn't believe into all that "hocus-pocus" as he calls it.

But Sir Geoffrey's spirit has said something. He's given a clue (apart from the will) that no living person could have known. What is it? Mick Grady starts to believe Millie.

Maybe we find out here that the two are old friends, perhaps secret lovers. Is there some sort of conspiracy? At that moment Amelia and Violet return to find them together. Amelia demands to know what's going on. Grady tells her that he has his suspicions and that he wants to see everybody present in the drawing-room the following day.

Scene Two: Everybody is assembled as requested. Sergeant Grady tells of his suspicions. He hints that he knows who the murderer is. He paces the room, reminding us of the events that took place at Kensington Hall, of the two "accidents".

This could be an opportunity to reveal something about one of the PIG team. Perhaps he or she has a link with Lady Amelia. Grady tells us. But it isn't enough. He still has no hard evidence. Robyn announces that her team will conduct a final investigation that very night. Maybe the truth will out....

Scene Three: The PIG team are assembled. They check their equipment. The clock strikes twelve. The ghost of Lady Elora appears. She tells what really happened: Lady Amelia is the killer.

The ghost leaves. The lights come on. Sergeant Grady enters. The PIG team tell him about what they saw and heard.

There's a mighty crash off stage. Millie comes rushing in. She has bad news. Lady Amelia has fallen down the stairs—the very stairs that Lady Elora fell down. She's dead.

Millie is holding a document. She says she found it under the top stair. When Amelia tripped, her foot dislodged it.

It's Sir Geoffrey's will. Lady Violet snatches it from Millie and reads it aloud. Geoffrey stated that in the event of his sudden death, his estate and fortune should go to Elora's family and to the daughter he and Elora had together in secret.... Millie.

The Backstory

By now you've got used to characters in the play. I'll just give a quick rundown, if only to get them clear in my own head :0)

They are, in order of appearance....

Lady Amelia Kensington, aged 40, widow and occupant of a manor house somewhere in County Louth—or even *gasp* County Cavan LOL.

Lady Violet, 38, is Amelia's best friend and confidante. She's been living in Kensington Hall since the death of her twin sister, Elora.

Millie, 18, is Amelia's live-in maidservant. She's unhappy with her situation and seems to resent her employer.

Robyn, 27, is team leader of Paranormal Investigation Guys (PIG). She and her associates have been called in by Lady Violet, who's told them of ghostly occurrences that have been plaguing Kensington Manor for some time.

Krystal, 25, is a member of the PIG team. She's also a medium or psychic in her own right. She's attuned to invisible forces.

Brad, 23, is a member of the PIG team. He's more familiar than the others with the technical wizardry used to detect and record the presence of paranormal entities.

Detective-Sergeant Mick Grady, 30, is a close friend of Millie. As a uniformed sergeant he investigated Lady Elora's death but found no evidence of foul play. He's also acquainted with the work of PIG—they were called in to help with one or two Garda cases—and doesn't have a high opinion of them.

Lady Elora was Violet's twin sister.

Sir Geoffrey Kensington was Amelia's husband. He had an affair with Lady Elora.

What went before....

When the curtain rises, there are three people left at Kensington Hall. They are Lady Amelia, Lady Violet and Millie. To understand the play, we need to know the backstory. Here it is, point by point.

1. Sir Geoffrey Kensington, Amelia's husband, has a love-affair with Lady Elora, a pretty neighbour.

2. Millie discovers the affair. She blackmails Sir Geoffrey, demanding money. She threatens to tell Amelia.

3. Before Millie can get her money, Amelia returns unexpectedly from a trip abroad. She finds her unfaithful husband Geoffrey in a compromising situation with Elora. They're unaware that she's found them out.

4. Amelia lays her plans. Geoffrey takes medication for a weak heart. Amelia ups his dosage and he dies of a heart attack. Nobody suspects foul play.

5. Millie says nothing to Amelia. Her plan to blackmail Geoffrey has backfired. She despises Amelia but bides her time. She believes that the future holds another way of getting her hands on some of the Kensington money.

6. Four months after Geoffrey's death, Amelia pushes Lady Elora down the stairs at Kensington Manor. She dies. The death has all the appearances of an accident.

7. The police are called in. The investigation team is led by Sergeant Mick Grady. He declares Lady Elora's death to be an accident. By this time, Lady Violet has called in the decorators. She's saddened by all traces of her dead sister and wants the place renovated. She moves in with Lady Amelia.

8. Soon after, strange events begin to occur at Kensington Manor. Vases and other objects are smashed. There are rappings and unexplained creaks and groans in the middle of the night.

9. Lady Violet suspects that it's the ghost of her dead sister Elora. She calls in PIG to investigate.

10. At the same time, Millie suspects that Amelia murdered Elora. She calls in Mick Grady, now a detective-sergeant. His visit almost coincides with the arrival of the PIG team....

The Plot Thickens

So last Saturday we looked at a number of things:

1. The stage.

You saw how a simple platform, slightly raised above floor level, can be transformed into ... well, into any space you wish.

2. How an actor uses the stage.

How to stand, walk, sit and ... above all, how to make your voice heard. We'll come back to all those in due course.

3. How to devise a play.

The hard part! However, you now have the basis of what could be a great comedy. It's modern but with an old-fashioned setting.

4. How to plot a play.

The plotting is the challenging part. It's very like plotting a novel or short story, the difference being that it's the players on stage who tell the story.

This is why each character has to be very well drawn. But more on that later.

Okay, here are my thoughts on what we did on Saturday. They're in no particular order. I simply wrote them down as they occurred to me.

I love the idea of the ghost who's come to take revenge on her killer! This has great potential. It's a traditional idea going back centuries. Shakespeare had the ghost of Hamlet's father returning to tell how he'd been murdered.

Katie wants to play the ghost of Lady Elora. Good. However, I see a logistical problem, and by that I mean that timing could be an issue.

I'll explain. We didn't see it on Saturday because Katie wasn't in costume but here's the thing. If she's going to go from Lady Violet to the ghost then she's going to have to do a very quick change, and whoever's doing her make-up is going to have to be pretty fast as well.

So here's what I propose. The ghost doesn't appear until very late in the play. In fact, her appearance will be the climax. I think there should be a scene towards the end of Act Two when the paranormal investigation team have set up their equipment, and the ghost appears very unexpectedly.

This way, Katie and others have ample time to prepare her for the scene. In fact, Lady Violet could put in an appearance at the beginning of Act Two and go off again after a couple of minutes. But we'll see.

The Title

This should be really strong. Maybe we need to invent another big house and not use the name Anaverna. Something spooky like Wuthering Heights. There should be some reference to the paranormal in there too. Ghost, Apparition, Spectre, Haunting, that sort of thing.

The Unfolding

Similar to a book or short story, a play will have a backstory. In this case we have a murder that's occurred some time before the curtain rises.

Let's think about that some more. Lady Amelia has murdered her sister Elora. She's the only person who knows this: none of the cast knows it; the audience doesn't know it.

But Lady Violet suspects foul play, and that's why she's brought in the PIG team* to investigate. The team arrive and set up their equipment. They have no reason to believe that Lady Amelia killed her sister.

However, it soon becomes apparent that the PIG team are on the scent. Lady Amelia will try to discourage them - leaving the audience wondering why.

Towards the end of the play the ghost will appear. And all will be revealed.

The Characters and their Motivation

Motivation is crucially important to your play. The character you invent should be truly believable. There's no use inventing a stereotype: nobody will take that seriously. You need to give your character a personality and a life of their own. They must have their wants and needs, their emotions. Real feelings.

Everybody wants something. What does your character want? Love, success, riches, revenge?

Take the character of Millie, the maid. What does she want? Does she like or loathe her mistress, Lady Amelia? Her words and actions should tell the audience this.

What are the relationships of the characters to one another? What about the PIG team members? Is there rivalry there? If so, let's see it and hear it. Rivalries and jealousies make a play more interesting.

What about Lady Amelia and her sister? Or is Lady Violet her sister? It occurs to me that it would perhaps be better if the dead woman, Lady Elora, were Violet's sister. This would account for their striking resemblance to each other :0)

* Check out the PIG website for the sort of equipment they use!

Welcome to Stage One!

Hi from David.

The first post of the new blog. You do of course know that aisteoir is Irish for "actor".

I don't know the Irish word for "actress" but that's okay because I don't much like the term anyhow. Reminds me of "poetess" or "sculptress". Yuk. Like calling a female motorist a "driveress".

But, moving on. I just want to take this opportunity to welcome you to the world of drama. It's an ancient art form, dating back millennia. I'm sometimes surprised it's survived for so long.

I mean: look at the competition. TV. Film. Video. Online gaming. Even blogs like this one. So what's so special about drama, the theatre, that it's endured for thousands of years?

Theatre is little more than a conversation.

Except it's carried on in public, in front of an audience. And people (usually) pay to come along and hear the conversation.

Basically a play need be no more elaborate than one or two people talking to one another. (In fact, it can be even simpler: the so-called one-person show.) That's generally speaking a stand-up comedian entertaining an audience for an hour or two, but sometimes a play is written to be performed by a single actor.

That takes some skill. And a genuine lack of stage fright. The good news is that, long before you'll be in that scary position, you'll have shared a stage with a number of other players.

Sharing a stage means that an actor has lots of support from other actors. If you miss a line, a fellow-actor can improvise while you remember that line.

There's more to acting than you may think. In the weeks to come, we'll be covering many aspects of it. Stuff like projecting your voice so you'll be heard at the back of the room. Walking, sitting, laughing, hand movements, entering and exiting.

But first, we'll be looking at writing for the theatre.

"Author, author!"

That's a shout I haven't heard in a long time. It used to be commonplace. You heard it on opening night, when the playwright would be sitting somewhere in the theatre to watch his or her piece being performed.

If the audience liked the play a lot then they'd rise and applaud — the so-called standing ovation. If they thought the play was awesome, they'd call for the author, who would then appear in the spotlight and take a bow.

Quite right too. Without the author there wouldn't be a play. You'd have actors wandering about a stage with nothing to say.

Okay, okay, I know that's what mime is all about, but you get my point :0)


In the first couple of weeks we're going to look at playwriting. You'll discover how it's done, how to write dialogue — that important on-stage public conversation.

Together we'll devise a play, one that will include all the members of the group. It'll be new, something never seen before.

We'll work out the plot. Will it be comedy, tragedy? Who's to say?

Everyone will work on a single character. You'll be working on your character. You'll develop his or her personality. You'll write the words your character will speak.

When that's done, we'll rehearse the play at Anaverna.

Then we'll perform it! On opening night, when the play is over, the audience will applaud and yell "author, author!"

That will be your cue to step forward and proudly take a bow.